Speaker says kindness is contagious, but must be taught

Marjorie Kostelnick, dean of the College of Education and Human Sciences at the University of Nebraska-Lincoln, told the approximately 200 participants at the conference that developing the “kindness connection,” or pro-social behavior, is vital to anyone who works with children.

“If we promote kindness, we are likely to get kindness in return,” Kostelnick said. “And when lots of kindness is happening, everyone feels safer and more connected. It makes life more pleasant and those you are working with are easier to manage.”

The speaker also said that children who are kind are viewed as being smarter and more competent. Those in pro-social setting are more stimulated to learn, she added.

But Kostelnick said developing children who are kind doesn’t just happen. She said it is a learned behavior and that children need modeling. She also said pro-social behavior often involves risk because overtures of kindness are sometimes rejected.

“You can’t just talk about being kind,” said Kostelnick, who began her career operating a day care facility in Michigan. “Children have to be made aware when help is needed and shown how they should become involved. We usually think mostly about ourselves and don’t always realize we should be helpful.”

The speaker gave several examples where tragedies could have been averted if adults who witnessed an unusual event had acted. She also said that pro-social behavior among adults is probably more apt to happen in rural areas where people are dependent upon one another.